The old me used to experience this a lot: my chest contracting the moment someone commented on my self-expression or heart-driven pursuits in a way that hit a vulnerable spot—my heart. In response, I would close off, detach, and climb up my proverbial mountain, or I would go into defense mode and aggression. Either way, each time a new trigger hit an old wound, I would fall back on the emotional reactions and behaviors that I’d developed during my childhood and adolescence.
Klara, great attitude towards triggers. We cannot make them disappear, but what we can do is to use them as a guiding lights towards the territories where we can expand, learn and grow.
Tomas! Well said. As always. You have a way of expressing whatever is the point cleanly and clearly. It even feels effortless, as if it just flows out of you.
Yes! This. When someone says to me that they are completely disconnected from their true self, I ask them if they have ever been triggered. When you are triggered, it is your true self asking for protection. Instead of giving all of your energy to the protection, give it to connection with your true self instead. This piece and what you are doing with your life is a beautiful example of that!
Thank you for adding to the topic! I only have my personal experience and would be very interested in hearing more from you. I'll remember to bring it up as a suggested new topic for our Human Hour!
In the meantime, do you perhaps remember a source where I could learn about this more? An older post of yours maybe? Anything.
“Consider those who trigger you as allies who showed up to facilitate your upgrade. They do you a great service by hitting the parts of you that kept you spinning, parts you might not have seen on your own.”
Totally agree Klara. Another frame I take is thinking what is going on for these people that they actually put you down? The sad part is, the put down is all about them and not about you. When we judge others, we’re really judging ourselves.
Oh yes. Thank you for bringing that connection up. It's so true. For a long time, I was internalising those commentaries and falling down on the same level from which they were coming. But at some point, I was suddenly able to be in the situations differently. I realised that I was a trigger for other people's fears and insecurities that were (probably unconsciously) coming to the surface in this form. That was the moment I turned it around and started to use my conversations as a way of collecting information about the people I wanted to speak to. "Aaaah, so this is what you are afraid of... And this is what you needed to shift it..." :)
Klara, great attitude towards triggers. We cannot make them disappear, but what we can do is to use them as a guiding lights towards the territories where we can expand, learn and grow.
Tomas! Well said. As always. You have a way of expressing whatever is the point cleanly and clearly. It even feels effortless, as if it just flows out of you.
Klara, thank you very much! This feels so good to hear!
Yes! This. When someone says to me that they are completely disconnected from their true self, I ask them if they have ever been triggered. When you are triggered, it is your true self asking for protection. Instead of giving all of your energy to the protection, give it to connection with your true self instead. This piece and what you are doing with your life is a beautiful example of that!
Thank you for adding to the topic! I only have my personal experience and would be very interested in hearing more from you. I'll remember to bring it up as a suggested new topic for our Human Hour!
In the meantime, do you perhaps remember a source where I could learn about this more? An older post of yours maybe? Anything.
“Consider those who trigger you as allies who showed up to facilitate your upgrade. They do you a great service by hitting the parts of you that kept you spinning, parts you might not have seen on your own.”
Totally agree Klara. Another frame I take is thinking what is going on for these people that they actually put you down? The sad part is, the put down is all about them and not about you. When we judge others, we’re really judging ourselves.
Oh yes. Thank you for bringing that connection up. It's so true. For a long time, I was internalising those commentaries and falling down on the same level from which they were coming. But at some point, I was suddenly able to be in the situations differently. I realised that I was a trigger for other people's fears and insecurities that were (probably unconsciously) coming to the surface in this form. That was the moment I turned it around and started to use my conversations as a way of collecting information about the people I wanted to speak to. "Aaaah, so this is what you are afraid of... And this is what you needed to shift it..." :)